And so the lord Isaiah went forth and came fifth.

The world is one almighty stage, shame it has so many curtains.

The thing I love most about God is he's big enough to admit when he's made a mistake.

And then Moses stood upon the rock of the shore and held up the staff, with an almighty voice cried for the tenth time you will see the power of the "????".... do you know what bollocks, how many bloody miracles do I have to perform before you lot realise the lord is working through me. No I'll tell you what you can all bloody swim here Joshua you take over I'm off , god you think they would of got it after the seven plagues.

‎'Mario' yes Lord, why have none of my children honoured my word... I think lord its because your not hip, what do you mean brother, "that's exactly what I'm talking about, you just cant go around any longer calling people brother and sister it just don't wash. 'Bruv' OR 'Siss is ok, oh I see, and what of my parables, well you could have re spoken them with a bit of humour, give me an example then bruv, god your a quick learner well I am the lord (example) like the bottomless pit, yea errmm why not "the more you big it the more you dig it" ok I'll remember that Mario thanks for being the one to test the water, don't worry lord I’m sure they'll love you, because this world is already a laugh a minute, what do you mean do you like punch and Judy yes why' well your going to love politics anyway take care bruv.

Why did Moses take the ferry… because it was the Lords day off.

When in our journeys does one no longer need climb any more mountain, when one no longer looks down upon that's when.

Lord when I looked up and saw you standing at the edge of the mountain, with your hands cupped it started to rain, funny it wasn't raining where i was standing.

All students become teachers, even though all teachers are still students.

Do the leaves of a tree dishonor all the others that they do not flourish upon the same branch ? No of course not, then why do we.

Living in this world is like making out with a prostitute, you get fucked and then on top of that you got to pay for it.

So the Lord God called upon three of his angels to be sent forth upon the earth in the time of Hercules to do battle with the Devil, on their returning the Lord saw a toad a lion and a ram standing before him. The toad and the lion looked at each other in astonishment, how did he make it back as a ram, and the lord replied, toad as a beautiful butterfly you was a gift but also a curse. Longing to be kissed so I gave you your wish, you will know your true love soon enough, for the one whom gives loves true kiss and makes you into a golden eagle is the one for you. Tiger you was not so quick to damn others with your wisdom and this is why as my most honoured captain you have no stripes and are now my golden lion. And as for you cheeky little ram, the tree of life for as a dog not only did you acknowledge me but you had even come to acknowledge every tree, and the lion, toad and the lord did laugh, and ram whom was still oblivious had made them laugh just that bit more.