Hello kindly once more,
Since my last post, about trauma life, low self esteem, borken-heartedness, unloved dysfunctional environments&parents, loneliness...wretched Gollum life...*weeps* :(
I like to ask this question...Sex what is it?....Porn?.I was never told anything about it, except that its a (taboo...parents!). A sensitive empathic answer I like please. I don't buy all the gender-stereotyped rubbish (brainwashing, propaganda...lies!..Evil illuminati!) of the media! Asides through all the toxic psychotropic drugs I was forced to take (evil psychiatry!...toxic,toxic!) I seem likely to be sexual dysfunctional (erectile dysfunction?!?) , soeme tardive dyskinesia too! Is sex really needed? No idea...I hope I posted this in the right place...Here I post my painting of my broken heart...
This is my painting...I often paint...I hope the photo is clear enough
I have a broken and sick heart...This so sick world (no empathy...my 'soul seems female' NOT male) gave me more traumas & deep depressions, than anything else! Seem to carry female energy, which this sick world hates. Eaten tons of chocolate, fish, and drowned tons of cups of strong coffee beyond count,still do...addiction, addiction. An Emotional wreck,feel I failed...failed...Need healing, real deep healing!...'Shamanic Healing' is that any good? It mentions 'soul loss' occurring, in the happening of traumatic events (had many) ...That sounds far more plausible than any of that filthy toxic psychiatry fake-science rubbish! [www.cchr.org] But finding one that is within reach and affordable, proves a real pain (the ones I found were in country towns, no public transport]! *river-cries* :( So the issue of finding suitable (sensitive empathic) healing remains...
And this...Planet x is coming in the nearer future...
http://galacticconnection.com/planet-nibiru-is-coming/#sthash.OmMlwAhf.dpbs
http://galacticconnection.com/20-facts-about-nibiru-planet-x/#sthash.f1v7yK92.dpbs
http://galacticconnection.com/planet-x-proof-of-nibiru-despite-nasa/#sthash.r07JQrwT.dpbs
http://galacticconnection.com/planet-x-nibiru-sun-blackout-in-march-2016/#sthash.s0pj1LFD.dpbs
If this is true, including the prediction of planet x coming sometime next year. Where does that leave poor souls like me?!? I want no ascension, sick heart/soul, trauma, etc...feel this is for me far toooo soon. Asides I had more or less an atheist kind of upbringing, without offense meant...no religion , including all that 'christian' soup which sounds to me ;like a lot $greed-coorps manufacture to spend tons of money on rubbish...Paganism, brainwashing...propaganda, including the so depressive irritating rotten music they blare everywhere (yucky green-red colours)....No thanks! And I already saw some traces of the coming of another commerce pagan $Xmas onslaught now...*dread* :(
I prefer silence to all this noxious depressive noise and $commerce...A trip into the cold would be real good (before planet X)...polar regions...Photos from polar regions seem to have had a strong pull (must have a reason)...Have a number of polar brochures and books. Its true, I always loved cold weather (including thick snow) not hot, which always made me feel real miserable even health endangering (dizziness, mega-headaches...near heat stroke experiences...polar bear sweating and more),...like in a prison, I just cant stand heat! Read in a recent New Dawn magazine about RH-Negative blood types...there its mentioned about unable to stand hot weather....Thats to a great extent my case.....Is that what they mean with nordic blood or? ...Maybe someone can answer this. Had no blood test to confirm yet, but I feel alien, including very strong aversion to hot weather...strong intuition too (childohood)....I forecasted whats about to happen, and parents didnt listen...it was at times very visual flash.... Heat always makes me feel sick...not the cold though...Love snow, and the jackets that I even see in Sydney, I dont need at all...
.Apologies for the lengthy post going to certain extent beyond the initial question...I'm not often online (no internet at home) and hope one understands...And leave with some scene links of polar regions...
~peace & light~
herbert
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/be/Arctic_Sunset.jpg
http://www.arcticphoto.is/wp-content/gallery/aurora/Aurora_Panorama_752Pixels.jpg
http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/image/1207/aurora_goldpaint_1200.jpg
http://wallpaperest.com/aurora-online-wallpaper-009944
http://blog.sunvil.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/Copy-of-Svalbard-43041.jpg
http://www.reidtravel.com/upload/images/CFD6CW_Paradise%20Bay,%20Antarctic%20Penninsula.jpeg
There are sure lots more...May these inspire others...Nature makes art...*peace*
Replies
Listen dearest I'm here if ever you need to talk such a beautiful soul.... I have some thoughts on those paintings .....
@Lisa
I'd VERY much like to see You repairing this poor soul.
He's a genious, and an absolute one.
His thoughts however, needs to be re-focused and he also need to be taught how important it is to love oneself before one can learn how to love the World as it is.
You've got your work cut out for you, my love, but .. It's also a work I think you (if anyone) can handle. :)
He won't listen to Me, since I won't reinforce his current disbeliefs, but ... Where I can't reach him, You can, since .. You're Special. :)
I don t know I'm special but I feel his anguish.... He is such a sweet soul....
I feel his anguish too, and I can identify with most of it.
You however, are Special. You can not only identify with it, you can also DEAL with it, and in ways that I nor anyone else of my profession ever could.
Trust me, the speciality of You, is truly Special. You're a resource here. :)
Although, if his only mission on this site is to whine about his reality and gain supporters in order to reinforce it, there won't be a power in the universe who can save him, since I will put my full effort into breaking him like a matchstick (as were done to Me when I was in such a "mentally depressive. but still seeking reinforcement loop"). ;)
The positive thing in all this, is that in 150 years, your art will be selling for the same prices as Van Gogh's paintings are selling for now. :)
Oh, sweetheart. Magic word: NOOTROPES. The Earth is full of remedies. You got VIT.C as my Ashtar Sheran's Starseed told me. It's magical. Try it. You got Magnesium: it alkalines the body. You got nootropes as "Racetams", find your best. You got "Tribulus Terrestris" for Testosterone. You got "Q10" Ubiquinone for cells. You got Weed Oil. You got Ribes oil. You got Linus Usatissimus oil. You got everything. Study. Make your choices. Try them for this life. I can modestly add I'm being a Super-Star in Music. Every celebrity is activist for something. I have choosen "Psychiatric Abuses". Don't worry. Make yourself an idea with all the elements I gave you. You deserve the best. And if you don't have enough money find a boy or a girl that pays you.
Hold on .. wait just a minute.. Did you just suggest Tribulus Terrestris?
For Gods Sake man .. Don't you know that THAT particular drug is synonymous to Anabolic Steroids?
I know people who've taken that drug, and they turned anti-human in notime. would you like our beloved OP to turn into a monster?
I ask, because many of the things you've suggested as a "remedy", would turn him into JUST THAT.
Pfff .. if we're talking nootropes, then DMAE and Piracetam are the only drugs to choose. 200mg DMAE and 2000mg Piracetam (Nootropil) will turn even a severely autistic mind into a rather pleasant human being.
However, they'll do nothing but greatly ENHANCE your ability to deal with thoughts and experiences. If you steer your thougts to focus on how bad things are, they'll enhance your ability to do that.
In short. Only use NOOTROPES when you're sure that you can steer your thoughts in a positive manner. If you use them while you can not, you'll find yourself in a severe psychosis before you can spell "what the hell did I just do to my brain?". ;)
But with humankind it looks like Eve has been ripped off from adam's chest. The Goddess is missing. Ask your little gods about that, they're responsible for this experiment on Earth.
Love. Expressing our sexuality shows our desire of becoming One again, involves feeling each others' body with every sense. Sharing consciousness about life's beauty and affection. Sometimes passionate, sometimes soft, yet always love.
Divine. It IS our divine nature, far from what has been taught here on earth. Reason why so many people has this fearful, often harmful and instinctive view of sex. Sometimes turning aggressive, possessive, shallow or humiliating. Shows fear, self-rejection and lacking love.
They often end up involving someone else, which is my case. I suffered trauma because of my progenitors, their lack of consciousness, inherited by their parents, which was given by their families, again, always involving misschievous religious beliefs, distant parenting, deeply bound to their dna. Symptoms from rigid structures and old paradigms.
Porn. What I've seen holds little meaning, as with any interaction that involves roles and little consciousness regarding life's beauty. Symptomatic in some cases, harmful towards sexuality itself.
Love, like life, is unconditional. Otherwise it turns numb missery.
Experience. Whatever may be your inner "reality" life will often give you that in return.
Beautiful human beings, and children, are often attracted to me, yet some males don't seem to share the same enthusiasm, for some reason.
This means I reside within higher forms of "reality" 4th and 5th dimension. We're living here, on Earth, yet our inner selves often shift in between them, setting up our physical experience.
Therefore, hold heaven within your heart. Then life will make it rain, whatever it's that you've created inside yourself.
Do you feel like abundance, beauty, divinity? Because that's what people's face look like, when looking into my eyes.
I feel so... imperfect, and yet there's people, just knocking at my door and saying "I'm interested" Yes, coughing exaretaly, picking my attention in many, many ways. They're often lively females of all ages, with sense of humanity and freedom. Fearless strength and love. Independent.
It's terrifying, feeling like a kitten among tigresses about to eat me up! Amazing too, it makes me rest easy, such strong feminine force, taking into account what has been going on with Earth, regarding our Goddess.
Feeling alive!
But I'm having issues with life right about now. I'm damaged 'cause my childhood, and in between earth and my soul Sister. I shared creation with her, everything, till she left me here to die, misserably... and probably painfully too, far away from her arms.
Do you hear me from up there?!
About our star portal, yeah, it's kinda hot in comparison with home. Our star gates are much more pleasant to look at, with seasons like autumn and spring forever. We used to play music together and enjoy from each other's company, surrounded by nothing but life. Now look at me...
Missing home, my family, our consciousness, everything about the sky! Life offers me life, yet my fearful self rejects it.
What the hell am I doing?! She told me like a thousand times already. "Live, live you incredulous fool! For I have not yet arrived"
I miss you...