Hello!
Just a quick question. I'm currently involved in quite a messy situation where basically, I'm going to have to go down the route of removing an individual from their position, due to the negativity that they are creating within a particular area. This is in the 'real' world by the way, not in the astral realms!!
Essentially, this person has 'dug their own grave', so to speak, and although my gut is telling me that this is the right thing to do, I worry that my ego is coming into this, as this person is one of very few who I struggle to see the good in on a day to day basis. There is also the fact that I will benefit from their removal in many ways (some direct, many indirect).
They're no monster and I can see how they ended up where they are and feel empathy for them in a lot of ways, but the fact still remains that they are causing damage to many other people who I care about deeply and their ego is such that speaking to them directly about this isn't an option!
I still feel that I am the right person to be making this decision and am trying to ignore what I personally have to gain from this but it worries me that this is influencing my choices on some level that I'm not acknowledging.
On the one hand I have the individual and their family who I know will suffer but on the other, I have potentially thousands of individuals who are losing out due to the actions of this person!
What are your opinions on doing something unpleasant to help others? Greater good type statements really don't sit well with me yet I keep ending up in these situations!!!
Peace, light and love
Catherine xxx
Replies
Hello again!
Thank you all so much for helping me with this one, it's a very sticky sort of 3d situation to be in! It's good to think about it differently.
It's a situation that's been sent to test me on quite a few different levels, I think! It is better for me if this person goes but at the same time, it is also better for everyone else around him for exactly the same reasons. All I can do in this situation is present the facts in a fair manner and let others who are supposed to make the judgement do so.
I guess what makes me feel uncomfortable is that naturally I would deal with this in a more direct way, but I can't do so without breaking a load of hr/legal rules and it really annoys me!!
The individual I am referring to must have what I can only imagine to be an unhappy life to have to behave in that way but it doesn't make being faced with it only a daily basis any less challenging!
I think that after the legal side is dealt with, I will have an open discussion with the person concerned and try to help them to move on from it.
Thank you again.
Peace, love and light
Cat xxx
Hi Catherine,
You're getting some clues from your own writing:
1. "my gut is telling me that it is the right thing to do"
2. "greater good type statements really don't sit well with me, yet I keep ending up in these situations"
What I get from this (personal opinion of course): you have chosen to end up in these situations to learn how to handle them and basically you already know what to do (intuïtion/gut feeling).
Then the "noise" starts: the ego kicks in debating, arguing what you already know/feel and overanalysing the lot.
All the thinking and analysing and looking at the situation from all possible angles is just slowing you down, diverting you from what your self has already told you.
Don't worry about right or wrong, there's always a right or wrong for someone in each situation, and even if you would get no benefit whatsoever from removing that person, even then somebody will probably pop up and claim that you did it out of self benefit. That's just how 3d works.
Look for the answer inside, choose what feels right for you, not what appears to be "logically" right and take responsibility for your choice and the consequences it brings. Stay true to yourself.
Have a most blessed day,
RWD
As a 20 year supervisor for a public agency I have had to make painful decisions that sometimes resulted in termination of an employee. I always take myself out of the equation - as you are doing. I look soley at behavior - and work performance. I make sure I work with the individual over a period of months (in one case 2 years) to give him or her every opportunity to improve. But ultimately - I am paid -using taxpayer dollars - to ensure that each employee contributes quality of work. If I see that someone who reports to me is unable to do the job or is otherwise hurting the agency, it is my duty to take action. I think you are doing what you are paid to do and if the position is wrong for that person - remove him or her so that they can find a better fit and everyone ultimately wins. I am always compassionate - direct - fair - and make sure the individual understands it is not personal. Still is hard - but must be done. Prayer - love - light helps.
Wow this is a conundrum i think we all will face at some point in our lives. I would call it volentery intervention angst , ' i must act in order to preserve'. Do we allow the negative flourish and spread or do we hope it will cease or change organically? Is the negative really negative? What is the negative teaching? What is the best/worst case scenario? Am i alone in my perception of the negative? Am i the negative in my own personal perception without realizing? Am i acting out of ego or love? If it is a simple case of removing someone (without violence or threat) from your life in order to preserve stability and positive harmony in your own life then i think its wise to do so and time will judge whether you were correct or not, but if you are doing it because you think it will benefit other people then i would think long and hard and speak to all concerned about the situation in order to get the BIG PICTURE and avoid any actions that could become harmful or hurtful to yourself and others around you. Think and trust your heart and you won't go to far right or wrong. Love, light and luck!
Just be clear on what your intent is in taking this action.
Is it the most compassionate alternative?
Can you make the changes to your ego to allow you to speak to him directly about it?
Because that is, inevitably, the most compassionate solution.
There is always a way to tell someone what they need to hear in a way that they have no choice but to accept. Are you prepared to find it? Is it worth it? It may not be worth it for him, or the situation, bur it is worth it for you. Because he doesn't have the problem with his behaviour. You, and everyone else does.
Namaste.
I infuse my every decision and action with the intention of greater Love.
Hi,
Yeah, I think tough love is about right......I guess I might have chosen this job but it doesn't mean I always have to like it!!
Lol, no, there is no violent intent, it's an individual who has some quite serious behabioural problems. It's not their fault but the affect on others is still the same, sadly.
I love the idea of being behind the fence in that video but can only imagine how terrified I'd be if it actually happened, lol!
Cat xxx
He is very lucky to not have his entire face ripped off accidently and it would be nobodies fault except his own..lol
And he is willing to take that risk because his Love is greater than his Fear...
... its not about Love.... its about Trust that have earned after many years of familiarity with them,....
maybe u have much bigger Love than him... but i would like to see u to go and try this...lol...
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