Hello my dear family.
I need to share something with you that is serious.
I don't think this is something I could generally share with many people on an understanding level outside of the GFL and a few close friends.

I want to leave the physical existance, to dissapear and return to the source.
Please, do not worry about this, I am actually happy in my life and I love the world but I just feel like I do not belong in this dense dimension anymore.
I feel a connection to Earth and humanity that is amazing but as a result I deeply feel the pain in this world and I frequently cry my eyes out. :'(

I have already had quite a fullfilling life even at my young age, I have achieved great goals, persued my passions for art, creativety, preofessional photography, light working, teaching, helping, loving and being loved...
The only thing I believe that is keeping me attached here is knowing that if I leave this place than I am reducing the amount of positive influence I could share around, even on the most minute scale."
The other things to consider is the consequences for such, the fact that I would possibly have to return here and do it all over again.

The desire to shut down my phsical body to die actually feels right to me.
Please understand this though, I'm not suicidal, I don't do drugs, alcohol and I do have my head screwed on properly (well, some of the screws may need tightening from time to time. lol). blank.gif
I often fantacise and wonder of a gentle and peaceful way to die consciously (not destructive things like jumping off a building or over-dosing on drugs).

This desire is overwhealming but I am not scared about it in the slightest.
I actually look forward to this day, when ever that day is supposed to arrive, regardless of whther I ascend to a higher existance or not.
The level of compassion and connection I feel to the current state of our natural world, social control, crime, negativety, sarcasm and the "war/greed/money" attitudes causes me an emotional roller coaster of chaos, complete with tornadoes, hurricanes and lightning strikes within my soul, while screaming out to the skies above me internally, pleading all of this global sadness to stop.

Please try to understand this message, I would not do anything silly or hurtful ever to myself (or others around me more importantly). I just need to open up to about this.

Have a great morning, beautiful people.  

Much love and hugs. <3blank.gif


You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Email me when people reply –


  • thanks for sharilng.

    i feel what you are saying, i too find it hard to accept this world of dualitly, with it's dark energy of killing to eat or die, and all the deceptions that the way of living in this competative animal actions all around us. it is hard on our feelings of kindness, and compassion in what we see in others feellings, actions, . i feel being aware or awake to this way of the earth is not what i would consider heaven on earth, i have a title for earth, but i will not say it, for it is not constructive or helpful. but i would rather know the truth, and BE wide awake to all actions with it's intentions.

    this is the 2012 year of enlightment of mankind, and i feel this reality of the earth of the past, it is NOT honey and cookies but of :it is what it is,  i feel this alone of now being awake is when it is said that change is to happen and degreed to be thousand of years ago, as in the comming of the photon belt as was stated then to be here now. for the saying of : ""forgive them for they know not what they do"" was in the past, now in this new era is to be cleanse for mankind and new manifestations are to begin for the better, at least this is what i believe, feel, and somehow know: it is what it is. i know we are not alone, and they are no longer in the mode of just watching and hiding from view from us, i can feel the love.

    blessings to us all for we are all one.

  • I just went through this and am over it now, after really absorbing these concepts: 

    -  You can only be healed while in a physical body, otherwise the wounds that were obtained while in the physical body are not addressed.  Stay and be healed before you go.

    -  Your soul enthusiastically chose to have you be here and was so thrilled to manifest this life experience.  Don't waste it. Know that you are a divine being and are here to create from the perspective of being in a physical body, here and now.  It is a gift to be alive on this planet right now to observe this amazing ascension. 

    -  If you are still here, it is because you are still meant to be here.  There is an absolutely perfect time already picked out for your transition to the next destination and you need to keep a sense of trust in that.  There's no need to even think about exiting, since you've already got that exit plan.  Focus on that perfection and enjoy the ride in the meantime.  

    -  From Susann Taylor Shier:  when you want to say about life, “stop that train, I want to get off”, this is a symptom of separation and a call to reconnect (Storm, separation is part of what you need to stay and heal).  Say: without connection I have nothing going.  With the intention of connection, I have everything.  From this place of connection, I feel what?  What do I want to create now in that space/feeling?  And get back into creator mode.  

  • Namasté - Magical Healing Mantras

  • I think then, Im not alone,I too feel the same as you do... Am looking forward when I change my form, and leave my physical body.  I too am a very sane person, had quite a full life, a mixture of tragedies and happy moments!!! but I certainly feel Ive had enough of my share and experienced more than enough in one lifetime!!! Its time to enter another plane, face new challenges/experiences!!!!

    3D plane is quite exhausting....too much of misery all around.  Feel troubled to see souls suffering, starving, having no finances to cure their near and loved ones, thus facing the gates of death!! If I had a magic wand I would definitely ease suffering on our planet!!! We desperately need help and a lot of love to heal our world...God bless all living beings/creatures/on our planet and beyond..take care dear friendz...Love <3


  • Yes -you have to return and do it again and sometimes, they say, things a re harder and thoughts of suicide are more constant-do you any devotions? If you don't like Christianity try one of the yoga systems-bkakti yoga is really satisfying-good luck

    • I for one do not see this in any way as suicidal thoughts or tendencies.

      It is for me a recognition of what is truly important and real.  The physical

      vessel is just a tool and illusion for being and navigating in 3D.  When

      we no longer need to be in 3D, we are either transformed (via vibration)

      or die in the physical.  We are fortunate to live at the time when transformation

      is possible, due to the creation of our light bodies.  Once the light body is

      fully functioning, then it is just a matter of when Source's perfect timing is

      for us to leave!  We do not have any control over when this is, but we do

      have the ability to have an inner knowing of when our time is coming to

      a close in this final act of the 3D world.  This is what is happening for many

      starseeds now.  The know that their work is over and are either waiting for

      something to line up in the cosmic picture to be taken home or to go on

      to 5D Terra.

  • I say ask for a transfer, so that a walk-in may continue with their learning if you believe that you are done here. But transfers are rare, but if you feel so strongly about it then I don't see why they wouldnt grant you one, we always have the choice here.

  • Dear Storm Angel My name is joe gaethofsand i can give you the answer Go to web site Hollow Earth and contack them and tell them what you need and they will help you. Hollow Earth is in 5th demention and you do not need to die from this demention., 3rd demention of our earth went to 4th in  2006 Dec.21st2012 earth is suppose to go into 5th Dem  Hollow earth is in 5th now. Now They are bringing people to hollow eart starting about the28th of april on the east coast so if you live near an airport they will pick you up and then fly you into Hollow earth,so you do not need to die this is foolish on you part,your soul is needed for all of us souls o n this planet,i am sure you have mnany beautiful things yet to do forever in this universe.May god bless you honey  and have a very happy life for ever you are emortal god love you      Joe Gaethofs

  • I feel the same way as you do.  I do not believe it is a sign of wanting

    to escape.  I actually feel as though it is a sense of higher knowing

    that we are actually not going to need or be in our physical vessels

    for much longer.  We are able to see this illusion and the illusion

    of the physical as not being who we really are.  Some of us are

    leaving or shifting our physical vessels to 5D and I am one of these

    that will be shifting before many as my work is now done here in

    this dimension.  My work is in 5D and from there I will be assisting.

  • Storm Angel my heart would break if you left us..

    Maybe a holiday is called for and a change of heart

    may see you return..

    Please give my undying love to you homeworld ..

    You should be proud of all the love you have given..

    We are forever in your debt..

    Ascend In Love and follow your dreams..



This reply was deleted.

Sananda, One Who Serves and Shoshanna - THE GREAT AWAKENING IS NOW COMING TO A CONCLUSION via James McConnell

ANCIENT AWAKENINGS Sunday Call 3/27/2022 (Sananda, OWS, & Shoshanna)James & JoAnna McConnell THE GREAT AWAKENING IS NOW COMING TO A CONCLUSION Sananda and One Who Serves channeled by James McConnellShoshanna – Joanna’s Higher Self These messages…

Read more…
0 Replies
Views: 1078

Ashtar, One Who Serves and Shoshanna - YOU ARE CREATING YOUR NEW REALITY via James McConnell

ANCIENT AWAKENINGS  Sunday Call 3/20/2022 (Ashtar, OWS, & Shoshanna)James & JoAnna McConnell YOU ARE CREATING YOUR NEW REALITY Ashtar and One Who Serves channeled by James McConnellShoshanna – Joanna’s Higher Self These messages were given during…

Read more…
0 Replies
Views: 548

Copyright Policy: Always Include 30-50% of the source material and a link to the original article. You may not post, modify, distribute, or reproduce in any way any copyrighted material, trademarks, or other proprietary information belonging to others without obtaining the prior written consent of the owner of such proprietary rights. If you believe that someone's work has been copied and posted on Ashtar Command in a way that constitutes copyright infringement, please Contact Us and include the links to these pages and relevant info. 

Latest Activity

AlternateEarth replied to AlternateEarth's discussion Trump Expects to Be Arrested Tuesday Following ‘Illegal Leaks’ From Daniels Probe by Manhattan DA
"Trump paid Stormy Daniels $150,000-she probably made much more doing pornography. Biden has been paid millions by the Chicoms -Treason- and should be arrested and thrown in prison."
46 minutes ago
AlternateEarth replied to AlternateEarth's discussion Trump Expects to Be Arrested Tuesday Following ‘Illegal Leaks’ From Daniels Probe by Manhattan DA
"Drexk- Is that message for me? New will? What brought that on?"
51 minutes ago
rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
 Prayer is the very 1st beginning of the Awakening Process.One day we realize that something is very wrong with the World, we are not Happy, hardly no-one is and then we remember what JC said, that''The world is an Illusion, be in it but not of it''…
1 hour ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"Drexk-I watched tik tok once for about 30 minutes as I was doing busy work-one subject to the next-guitar rift to people crying to people shouting obscenities, etc. My mind was swimming and it took at least an hour think straight again-tik tok…"
1 hour ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"I've heard of that san-talking about demons and evil spirits(negative rituals for selfish purposes) and their influences has been banned from secular society -only 'religions nuts' believe in such things'-meanwhile satanic practitioners believe in…"
1 hour ago
rev.joshua skirvin commented on rev.joshua skirvin's blog post Your Sunday Digest for March 19,Patriot Underground did a fantastic big picture summary , [videos] Starship Earth:
"Patriot Underground did a Fantastic big picture Summary is a understatement !.. Its the Best of the Best that I have came across in many years and I have been posting here for 15 yrs. It covers everything that is happening now including…"
2 hours ago
ソウルライト SAN left a comment on Comment Wall
"Hi dears, I want to tell you a little bit about what I saw on TickTock and what I think about it. I'm talking about the so-called magical rituals. There are numerous videos on the subject. I myself have no intention of believing or imitating any of…"
6 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"My advice is drop Tik Tok, which is a Red Chinese abomination....It should be banned for public safety reasons....And I don't normally promote such bans....The UK government has banned it's use in certain executive circles..."
7 hours ago