Spiritual Forum

Once a couple had six boys.

They grew up pretty normal and became respected men.

They all built a house, planted a tree, married and had children.

The oldest one was different. He lost his house when he got divorced. No wonder, his brothers said, he always loves to read and was lazy caring about his household!

They were right. He had no golden hands fixing stuff in the house, and he felt comfortable with smaller income and smaller things. Finally his wife hated him and called him a loser. And his five brothers shook their heads and hated him too. Yes, he is a loser, they said.

His mom was the only one showing him love while his father could not reveal any affection, for he only loved diligent people like his other five boys. They were real men deserving respect.

Mom died leaving a mess of unbalanced man power. It was the sensible oldest one who prepared the funeral. He copied song slips for the hymns they planed to sing and spoke with the horn section. But the father finally refused the song slips, and all were standing around the grave being not able to sing one hymn - without the oldest son.

Typically, his brothers said, he must always march to a different drummer! No wonder, for he thinks he is special, that lazy bookworm!

The silent man was not thinking for one second about revenge. He loved deeply his kids and some women. He never raped someone, nor killed anybody, nor commited a crime. He was never jealous, nor greedy, nor obsessed with money. Instead, he published a couple of books without any word and was a master of listening to others.

Thus he became old. At the end he almost forgot to speek.

After his death he came to God who stood before him with tears in his eyes. Forgive me, son, God said, that you had such shitty life! It was my fault!

I need time to forgive you, said the silent man. I understand, God said.

After many weeks God thought he should visit the man again. Come in, said the man. Lord, he said, there is nothing you could give me, for I really don`t know what you could give me. I have the feeling I don´t need anything from you. But you need something from me which is forgiveness! Lord, tell me in all honesty, why does God need to be forgiven by a man like myself?

And God had again tears in his eyes and said: Because people like you are my heart and my soul and my being lovely! Your forgiving allows me to grow, and whom other than people like you I could ask for such favor?

And why do you provide shitty lives for people like me?

It is me that lives shitty lives, me in you. I have invented love, and I really believe, that love conquers all things, even most shitty lives. I needed you to make that happen!

And my brothers and my cold father, the man asked?

And God said: Do not believe a narrow minded life under many restrictions is that simple! Those people have to bear a heavy burden too! And I have also asked those ones for forgiveness, for they were the ones that opposed love in ways appearing most real. I needed them too to make love conquering all! I know, this often appears like a fucking serious game!

Is it not, the man asked?

Yes, it`s a game, God said, I had no better idea yet!

Ok, said the man, for the game´s sake: I won`t forgive you! And now leave me alone! We will speak later again...