Hey guys I wanted to start off by saying I hope everyone (If you celebrate in your country) I hope everyone had a very merry and fabulous Christmas!? If you don't celebrate well hey i hope you had a most wonderful and blessed day anyhow!?^_^
OMG girls things are getting a might bit complicated for me and I need a breath of fresh air and a different perspective, one of the reasons I'm here, LOL!?
To begin I know I'm well (pretty, cute, good looking however you want to term it, LOL, NO I won't say beautiful NO...NO...NO and I am NOT a vain or conceeded person I had to include this for reference only, LOL) the problem is getting hit on by guys and enduring sometimes their rather rude comments!?
I hadn't noticed this was a problem but it seems to be getting that way and what to about it is becoming the second problem, LOL!?
To begin I love Face Book and other social media, I well use it for spreading LIGHT and LOVE, LOL as a Light Worker you gotta use some form of media to spread the good cheer!? My problem is well I'm getting a lot of guys on there and most of them are cool but I seem to be attracting these foreigners and well they are asking me for personal information like my phone number for one!? Questions like these set off alarms in my head especially when I've only known the person for like a week and I only know them online and not in 3D!? I had to go off on this guy (which I don't particularly like to do) because he was getting pushy-demanding-and controlling, UHM this is a BIG NO-NO with me, I have ZERO tolerance for these kinds of people. He had been conducting himself candidly up until today and he pushed my buttons where I had to let him have it!?
Uhm I'm LESBIAN simply put so I'm not interested in men as far as relationship wise (so if you're a guy and you're reading this and you are interested in me PLEASE do me and yourself a favor and just move on to one of those online dating sites okay!?)
As far as I know AC is NOT affiliated or the kind of place for dating and such, so I feel comfortable here, but Face Book is becoming a bit of a problem...in the past I use to filter out men or people i thought were men, sorry guys I know this is wrong because you are not all bad, just like not all women are B*tches, LOL (and I hate that word BTW) LOL I didn't think that was a good idea filtering out the men because I can use there perspective in my work and for net-working so why should all guys be shut out simply because of a few bad apples???
It's just picking up on their signals and such is getting a little confusing??? Men think women are complicated WE ARE NOT, I find men more confusing than anything else!? To me they all seem interested in one thing and one thing only and again I feel this a "stigma" something that's going on with my own beliefs that are getting in the way of having good, healthy friendships with men!?
Being someone who suffered from both domestic violence and a rape I was terrified of men for many, many years and I use to carry a gun for personal protection, but I realized through years and years of therapy that one cannot live their life in fear, but still the alarms go off when people start asking for personal information and when they get controlling and demanding then I loose all understanding and restraint towards them!?
I'd like to hear from both guys and girls on this subject and how you handle it, give me your opinion, or ideas or just whatever you'd like to share would be most appreciated.
Hello Ogdoo, (a most interesting name for sure. Uhm what origin is that? If you don't mind me asking?) I like your comment, good stuff. Uhmmm I'm finding things kind of weird, like guys and girls that are together sexually, but they aren't in a relationship???? This is most confusing too me???? Does not compute???? It's hard to tell when a guy just wants to be your friend and when he has an ulterior motive. I can't approach each guy as if that's his motive, because I'm finding many that like you just want to be friends and nothing more. Being suspiscious of them is not fair and I don't like unfairness. I want to treat each person equally so I'm takinga closer look at this energy and why I'm attracting these kinds of people. Hey your english is fine to me, watch american tv (if you get it in your country) and yes you got a friend in me.^_^ Oh and thanx for your comment I appreciate the help.^_^
My advice would be to try to see past genders and don't be afraid to tell guys that you are not interested in them except being friends. Though this is sadly 99% of the guys worst nightmare in the societal "norm" to be "friend-zoned" by a girl. However, for myself I only have guys as close friends and I find it a bit boring. The girls seem to be on the same page (relationship or nothing) kind of separation. It's rare to see a guy and a girl together as normal friends without any kind of relationship just because they share the same values, opinions, interests etc. and in the eyes of others they cannot understand it.. and I also like you find it easier to become friends with girls online like communities like this (because of no physical connection?)
Though I understand that there is a strong pull between a male and a female in a more physical way rather than being with the same gender as a heterosexual, and this would be the only difference between genders. The rest is acting mostly of how society wants you to behave, if one could break free from this it should be no problem finding friends no matter what religion, gender or culture they represent.
Also if someone is disrespectful towards you by demanding things and wanting to control you, clearly mark that you won't tolerate that behaviour.
I'm sure I could have given you a clearer and more specific answer if I understood english better, long texts tend to swim away from the actual point ^^. Anyway I hope you have some kind of benefit from reading my opinion. If there's anything else you want to ask, just ask I'm here for you friend.