lost

on this day i am lost.it is the first year anv of my mothers death.from the  age of 11 to 34 i was a very violent man,

i pushed all that away from me to try and be a more understanding  man,but today my own brother,who stills judges me from my past pushed and  pushed till he got me to the point of anger.anger that almost took me over.  i walk away told him i dont need that in my life even if it means walking away  and never looking back.even an hour later the pain the rage is still in me i  even came close to hitting a man for bumping into me . shame is all i have at  this point.i am alone in a county with over 120 family members.....i am lost. im  sorry i can see this is not the line of this page but it was the first i cam  to.

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  • David,

     I give this prayer to you as I know it will help you. David was the beloved of God, remember that. In these trying times we are tested we are the strongest of souls.  I say this every night. Love to you ...

    Allow the light of your face to shine upon us, CREATOR. Allow my spirit to live and turn my darkness into light, For you are the fountain of life and in your light we're no longer blind. Creator send forth your light and your truth, guide me to your holy altar, to the place where you dwell. In obedience, I will present my thank offerings to you, For you have delivered me from death and despair and my feet from stumbling. In the anointing I know to walk before you Creator holding on to the light of life. Awakened are those who have learned to call you, who walk in the light of your presence, for your light is shown to the righteous and perfect joy is born to the faithful heart. I know to be obedient, For you are great, you who I've seen clothed with splendor and majesty. I know to say to my brothers and sisters that you who are wrapped with light and wear it as a garment, who stretches out the heavens like a tent and lays the beams of the upper chambers on our waters, You who make the clouds your chariot and ride on the wings of the wind. Today I know you are the lamp and the light of my path, for the unfolding of your words gives light and understanding to the simple. I know today that the sun will no longer be the light of my day, nor will the brightness of the moon shine a path for me, For who can shine brighter than our CREATOR? Who's Light is everlasting? Brothers and sisters become wise and know that the eye is the lamp of the body, so If your eyes can see the words I write, then your entire body has been filled with divine light.

  • at least you got the sense to realise all this, its not nice when someone keeps winding you up, its silly of him to do this to you, and cruel   xxxxxxxxxxxxx

    dont worry ..............

  • David, It is going to be ok. Work on yourself first and foremost.  IF YOU CAN try to forgive yourself NO ONE IS perfect, we all fall from grace - all fall short of perfection - all of us have fumbled in the dark at times. Work on yourself first and foremost and turn it around, and you will be a testimonal to others who might have gone through what you have gone through. Feather Winger and Andy are right balance all the chakras. AND yes you are never alone.......

     

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