Feeling under control

Hi, i want to make this quick because recently i had a nervious attack and feel like i can't type or do anyhing for much time, i feel most of the time, under control, i push myself into darkness and into the harsh smell of pain and suffering, i just let myself act like a demon because i feel it's the only thing i can do right, i mean the only thing that feels like connecting to something real. I feel that pushing me into darkness actually makes a connection, a connection to darkness, now that i can't connect to the light anymore. I also have a sensation of being under control, most of the time i have extremly agressive thoughs that actually hurt me like hell, and i can't stop it, so as words or thoughs like threats. I feel i'm some kind of prison. A prison of my mind. I have such a deep story, starting at the age of 13 seeing demoniac faces on the walls to being 17 (at the moment) and still feeling stuck in this huge darkness. I just want and need help, it's getting desperate for me and it's getting even worse. I've read about the dark night of the soul, but anyways couldn't find help. I really don't know what's the problem with me, i feel like if i was infected. 

Thanks, cheers from argentina

E-mail me when people leave their comments –

You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Comments

  • there is absolutely nothing wrong with you Gonza ;)... do you fear of what you feel and see? ... darkness is not evil it's neutral element ... without it you would never see the stars - light  ... now evil is something else it's a conscious ACT against universal law (what ever it is) -  we all have 'demons' inside ... well some metaphorically and i guess some literally who see it ... however the process to deal is the same ... face it ... Your Will is your Sword at your command ... i know its sounds lame and just words ... and most of the time it's hardly helpful ... stop resisting - what resists - persists ... relax,  otherwise you may miss the Exit sign ... if you concentrate solely on one matter in you life ... YOu know 'the dark night of the soul' - teaches one to be patience not only with yourself but also with the world around ... and if you look deeper - your light is always there, but it's your choice to avoid it or get a closer look ... ;))

    anyway ... you are not alone ... ;))

This reply was deleted.

Copyright Policy: Always Include 30-50% of the source material and a link to the original article. You may not post, modify, distribute, or reproduce in any way any copyrighted material, trademarks, or other proprietary information belonging to others without obtaining the prior written consent of the owner of such proprietary rights. If you believe that someone's work has been copied and posted on Ashtar Command in a way that constitutes copyright infringement, please Contact Us and include the links to these pages and relevant info. 

Latest Activity

Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"FAO: The Covid Vaxx Survivor-Evaders....😇👼🏻
As well as helping each other, there is also an offworld and innerworld support, for the survivors of the covid vaxx genocide.....We are never alone, even though so many think we are...It's a matter of…"
50 minutes ago
Drekx Omega liked Drekx Omega's blog post The Truth About Chemtrails - At Last
1 hour ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Nutrient deficiencies can also cause DNA damage...See this vid by the renowned Dr Berg...Also, that was good advice from Q......"Protect your DNA." It's about avoiding cancer, living longer, passing on healthy genes to children, as well as enabling…"
1 hour ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Hi Hugger....;-) Well I would suggest that the assault on human DNA has been conducted since the advent of chemtrails, back in the late 1990s...It was and is an attempt to prevent certain bands of cosmic ray penetrating DNA/RNA strands, transforming…"
2 hours ago
ET Hugger left a comment on Comment Wall
"Do you know these type of movies wherein a 6 year old is ten times smarter and faster than a bunch of mafia guys and a mean President?

That’s what it currently looks like. The Lightworkers vs the Crooks. The latter lack awareness and can’t keep up…"
2 hours ago
ET Hugger left a comment on Comment Wall
"How to protect your DNA?
Don’t get vaxxed.

Or is that too easy? 🤫"
2 hours ago
Ara posted a status
3 hours ago
Sirian Starlight left a comment on Comment Wall
5 hours ago
More…