is ascension real ?

is starseed real ?

is disclosure real ? even if yes, then what ?

at 32 years old now, and sadly still a loser & supposedly a "starseed" (although I honestly now sadly doubt if this whole thing is real or just another irresponsible human-made fantasy / imagination / wishful thinking / escape from reality ) , I've now come to a point of very depressed, identity & existential crisis, shattered, disillusioned with almost Everything in this so-called "reality / real world / real life" , misanthrope, and even suicidal...!

I pretty much disappointed my (chinese/asian) parents' expectations of me (to run a "successful business that makes lots of money, supposedly for my own future & 'stable financial security'),

I am therefore technically still jobless,
I am very lost & confused, and ironically, even getting so much worse, after reading/researching & knowing all about this whole "Ascension, Starseeds, Indigo, Disclosure, etc etc" things that sadly just doesn't seem to really happen (physically) yet. everything about those things are still just very vague, IMHO, and even sadly a lot of irresponsible & 'lowly' scams, lies, full of snake-oil men, full of the typical usual 'lowly' human's selfish "fame and fortune" gains (by false teachers, spiritual gurus, mentors, coaches, motivators, seminars, channelings,...and the 'sad' list goes on...!)

even when I know & am aware & also are often (even until now) told that I am highly smart/intelligent, wise, multi-talented (most especially in Music) , I feel that in the end, amidst this very harsh, cruel, mundane, boring, & LIMITED "reality / real world / real life", all those things/EVERYTHING are still amount to almost NOTHING ! simply because:

1) We are now , honestly in Reality / realistically & truthfully , are living in the "all about Money" era. where almost EVERYTHING about "success" is only measured simply & only by how much money you can make, and/or if you are famous / popular ("fame & fortune") , society (& humanity) is now becoming very materialistic, shallow, superficial, & short-tempered & short-minded. I feel that now/today, MOST humans/people don't really CARE about many other *important* humane qualities such as: passion, compassion, Honesty, Integrity, Creativity, Dreams, Freedom of Expression, love, genuine, care & empathy for/with each other & Nature & the planet, etc etc. instead, again, everything is nowadays only measured MOSTLY by one simple single thing: Money.

so if now I still -sadly/ironically- am not 'smart/good enough' at "making money" skills, also don't like to lie/cheat/trick other people/humans just in order to use them to make money for myself, then now I am doomed / a *loser* , in this ever-increasingly Capitalistic "modern" society.
so all my 'multi-talents' are basically for NOTHING, if I am not good/smart at making money. period.. !

2) Sadly , no, VERY sadly, 90% of people/humans (or perhaps even 99% !!) still think -and they somehow really deserve to think so! I'll explain more soon why-  that this PHYSICAL, MATERIAL Life / Reality is ALL THERE IS ! and NOTHING more !
People are becoming increasingly atheist , only believing in "YOLO" (You Only Live Once" materialistic/physical concept of living, and seek only materialistic pursuits, goals, targets, and "success" . Nothing more ... !

However, the SADDEST thing also is for all these so-called 'alternative / fringe' communities such as the "Spiritual" community (like in this ashtarcommandcrew forum/blog), New Age, and then also the whole "Truth-ers / Truthseekers", Ascension, Starseeds, Indigo, whiste-blowers, etc etc... All of them still sadly/unfortunately haven't given ENOUGH HARD, SOLID PROOF(s) of other "realities" existing, other than this very limited 'material / physical' ("3D") Reality !

or, even if they already DID, yet, it's all either too vague, contradictory with each other, full of inconsistencies, dis-beliavable-ity, and worst of all: full of dishonesties, scams, hoaxes, lies, & snake-oil men EVERYWHERE ! .. that no wonder it makes those 90% 'ordinary /average Joe' people/humans in our everyday's daily life to have such a VERY HARD time believing, or more importantly to *critically* believe in what you all said here. also the other very sad fact is: even some very HONEST skeptics & also "truthseekers" are often getting deleted, kicked out of the forum, banned, etc, just for simply being REAL HONEST & asking some very *PRACTICAL* & SINCERE questions regarding the PROOF of whether those 'non-physical realities' things are really real, or just sadly another man-made fantasy / creative Imagination / wishful thinking that are NOT based in everyday's harsh, cold Reality ... !

So thus therefore, in conclusion, it almost *honestly* seems like NOTHING really happens so far,
and here I am (or perhaps even some or many of us here) still feeling ever lost, confused, clueless, about : 1) whether all those things are really REAL (or *going* to be real soon) , or just a pretty fantasy only (to escape from reality!) ,  2) most importantly then, what I (or we) have to DO, especially after we have 'swallowed the red pill & go down the deep rabbit hole' (borrowing popular/famous quote from The Matrix series movie) and learned HEAVILY about all these 'Non-Physical' things (or "realms/dimensions/realities" ,..whatever) !?


What do I have to DO now ??? ...
or perhaps, is everything now TOO LATE , and neither of you can give me some *practical* answers ?... should I perhaps just give up to this 'harsh, cold, dry, mundane, boring, & very LIMITED' everyday's Reality / real world / real life , and just commit suicide ?? ... (come to think about it,..now that I am heavily depressed, existential crisis, lost, confused, clueless, and feeling that perhaps I have taken too many WRONG PATHS , ironically, by learning & 'filling my brain' with all these 'Non-Physical' stuff that are still not STRONGLY PROVEN / HARD PROOFs , and that perhaps everything then is maybe thus already TOO LATE for me, realistically / in reality (!) ,... then maybe suicide is NOT a bad idea after all...)

please help... sincerely & in practical, detailed ways ... I lost hope already ...

-a (supposedly...) "Starseed" , 32 years old from Indonesia-
Niki
(nikiwonoto@gmail.com)

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Replies

  • I'm gonna start with the expectations of your parents.  Speaking as one who knows what it's like to deal with disappointed parents, here's my advice: don't worry about disappointing them.  This is your life and you're job isn't to make them happy, it's to make you happy.  Your life belongs to no one but you which means you're in charge, not your parents or anyone else. They're get over their disappointment.  As for the New Age stuff, forget about it.  It looks like it's time for you to take a break from all things New Age.  The stuff you're talking about, I've been reading about since the 90s and a lot of it has probably been around since before the Internet.  Instead of wondering what's true about it and what's not, it's time for you to find your own truth.  I get that you want to get away from this world, you want the change that's talked about on the New Age sites but you must stop waiting and hoping for it.  

    Your life needs your attention now.  Hoping for aliens to save you or Ascension to make it all better won't do anything for you.  Right now, none of that is happening so let's deal with the present moment.  Now you say that you're tired of the materialism of many people.  I understand that, so what you can do is the opposite.  Be what you're looking for.  Be compassionate, honest, passionate, all the things you wish there was more of in the world.  I get that can be difficult right now because you feel depressed and suicidal.  I'm not going to tell you that you shouldn't take your life.  That is strictly up to you.  It's your life and you're responsible for it.  

    But I will suggest that you try doing volunteer work.  I know it sounds strange but helping others really can heal the heart.  Something else that can heal is to engage in something you love, something you're passionate about.  If you feel like you have no passion for anything, start with something you enjoy, something you care about.  But the most important thing is to deal with issues that are causing you to feel depressed.  I know it's a very hard thing to do; I used to be depressed so I get it.  But you have to face it.  The only way out of this depression is to deal with the problems and try your best to fix them.

  • "There is no gravity, the Earth sucks" "The darkest hour is just before dawn" "It is better than a toothache" "Count your blessings" "Ignore idiots like me who are full of sugary platitudes and stupid advice" "Quit measuring yourself against anyone else's values" "The experience of life is immeasurably mysterious, fascinating, and can be fun, too" "Relax" "Try harder" "Get a new grindstone and a new nose" "Take a nap, then when you wake, have a double espresso and some sugary, unhealthy snack" "Get drunk, screw somebody, and hope you don't catch the aids" "Ignore the last suggestion" "Ignore this entire reply" "Ignore me" "Ignore everything, 'cause you, baby, are where its at!"

  • It is a dark place that you are in. Ask yourself why you are here. If you do not have a decent answer or cannot stomach to go through with what you propose then continue to search for answers. You ARE here for a reason.  Entities that love you,  ARE interested in your progression.  You are NOT some random act of existence. Do not disappoint them by being tempted to press the reset button.  Follow it through and express your existence to its fullest, as best you can.

    At this point I would point you to Bashar's teachings.  They suggest that you cannot change the reality of the earth that you are on, but rather by shifting your frequency higher, you change the version of reality in which you can exist, which will serve your needs better than your current reality.

    Don't try to change the world bro.  Move up to a different world more to your liking.

  • Most humans delude themselves, not everyone of course. But most of the times it's stuff related with dreams, which is the reason why is so hard to prove their so-called facts. At least, what I've seen was inside this density, while I was awake, and there was quite a lot of people there too. So no self-delusion here, my dreams were proven right, which is why I'm so glad to now it wasn't just another illusion. But what I was told wasn't good nor positive, on the contrary, it was bad.

    I was still "alive" in said future, and still looking for the only person I've been searching for, my entire eternity... It's my only reason... you wouldn't understand, since humanity is, to some degree, an artificial creation. Which is why they care so little about you. Look at history for more details.
    My so-called brothers are already here, on earth, including her, this reason being why I'm lost in grief. It seems like they're here to reignite the Sun. I told them not to... but they wouldn't listen.

    Let's see if they open the secret vault first. So many secrets have been stored there by the one once known as the older(The great) on his conquest for truth.

  • This video is the real deal
    • To You at least. The problem with music videos and songs from BIG ENTERTAINMENT is that they mean different things for each who listen. To you, the video is a message. To me, it's just annoying. ;)

      • i think tina turner speaks a powerful message.....also i agree some parts are a bit corney....

        but i love tina turner
  • http://www.lifescied.org/content/7/1/132

    I hAve not done much research on it but I believe it to be very interesting to proving god....
  • this video will help.....

  • i cannot prove anything, i cannot prove that there are angels or that god exists, but that is the thing I don't have to prove to anyone because I have experienced it directly. there is no way to prove that other world's exist, but i don't have again to prove it to anyone because i experience it. i think why would we have DNA that is called the God DNA and people who have it tend to believe in God if there is no god. why would there be something in us that biologically connects us to spirit...... why would something like that be in place?? I know for myself having a good sounding board over something that has been time tested and proves to be true like zen buddhism is always good when you are unsure of something. i think what does this theology or philosophy teach or that teach. starseeds totally exist and you are surrounded by them.....

This reply was deleted.

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