Attachment

Is getting rid of attachment really such a good thing? I can see that attachment is directly linked to the pain of loss, but do we need to get rid of the joy of feeling connected to someone or something in order to understand or deter the pain of losing that person or thing? To me, it seems like there might be another way. In fact, it seems like a major life lesson, as life is composed of many meetings and partings-- waves of joy and sadness. The nature of death seems to imply something very beautiful in its desolation. What but love could cause such sadness? If sadness is nothing but a reflection of love, then there are ways to see it as love and nurturing in its own way.

And in a poetic way, is not loss also beautiful and inspiring? What if we were to go around highlighting the good of even the worst feelings, grow attached to the now and all that resides in it, and nurture those who are in pain? Why leave anyone alone to deal with or banish their own sorrows by not ever becoming "attached" in the first place?

Even the best of us will not banish pain from our lives, no matter how much attachment or materialism or ego we refrain from, so why not find another way to look at, accept, and envelop pain, rather than banish the things we think will bring it about-- because they are often wonderful.

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    • So, you're telling me that my correct usage of grammar is what is making it hard for you to understand my message?

      I don't know how I can be much more clear than I already was, but if I notice something, I will update it. If you have any specific questions on my message, I'd be glad to answer them for you.
  • I get into this conversation manny times with my wife. She thinks i am not enough attached to her to be able to say i really love her. I do not see it this way. Once a person realizes he is a soul with everything that goes with it the attachment goes away. In the place of attachment comes a inner knowing that surpasses al the attachments and free you from al kinds of side effects these attachments give you. Why stay attached to the feeling of missing someone that is in another place if you can travel there astraly or in other ways. I do it all the time. My wife and me were separated for more than 25 years still we used to meet on the astral planes al the time. There was a time i even was attached to my fysical pains and when they went away i missed them...but what i really missed was the things this attachment gave me...the not having to do my best, the pitty of others etc etc. And not to forget the role the Ego plays in all this. The Ego needs other Ego's to survive so he puts up this whole sceme together and we jump right into it. I agree on helping others in pain but it does not help anybody to become their pain and so multiply it. i really believe the restrictions put onto us as a soul here is a illusion, the pain,los,love and so on we feel and experience here has nothing to do with what we really are. How else do we explain Re-incarnation, Nde's and Astral traveling. I remember when i started to surf, there was my board and me+ the sea. After a year there was me who had become one with the board and the sea. I think we asimilate because it is in ouwer genes. This does not mean i need to be the asimilated thing itself like we are doing now with this 3D life. wel there i went again ...walking about out of the thread ...:))
    • Shelly, perhaps I can shed some light on this "how we are to survive by ourselves" question. I feel very strongly that these separations from some people is to create a void for others to enter. I feel it is more important now than ever before for People of the Light (by whatever label you choose) to unite, join forces in thought and vibration, recognize their oneness and that we are Soul family. What I feel happening in my Life experience is locating my "Soul Family", for I feel we have a job to do together.

      Please forgive me if I have not explained this very well. Another way to put it is this: I've been separated for a number of years from "my" genetic family, for we simply were not on the same path, or traveling in the same direction. I was always considered an oddball by my family, no one understood me......and I understand perfectly why now. I've been told by many in this particular incarnation that "you're weird". Translation: I don't understand where you're coming from. Well, I'm from another planet.....can you understand that? LOL

      Cheer up, Shelly. You have family here on AC.....I know there are many who Love and respect you and what you have to say.....I am one of them.
    • ~ya cedric, i can dig it.~

      attachment: it can be hard in a "relationship", because the basic thing (amongst other learned or innate behaviors) is to associate "attachment" with "love" (the whole "would you die for me?" idea) . i am currently in a very loving & deeply intense relationship as well (& prior, i was in the same relationship with Life & MySelf, lol.. still am..) , & i am trying to show & be/demonstrate how non~attachment plays out on a variety of perhaps previously unimagined spectrums & the profound beauty & depth of intimacy that can be found on those levels.i am being this, myself, without the fear of loss, or pain of attachment to my partner.. it is my reality, & has been for lifetimes. my partner is holding on tight while, at the same time, learning to let go. a beautiful film which demonstrates the height of ecstasies & depth of sorrows & karmic timeless~connectivity of such a relationship & the possible depth of love (for self & other) is The Fountain. ~ :0) ~we learn it. be it. live it. die it.~
      • For the first time i have to agree with you...
      • This is how i live it to. you put it nicely the non-attachment and the diff spectrums of it. :)) I am already aware of the attachment and the diff spectrums of that state.
        • My experience is that the less attachment i experience the more love i feel, and the more i feel light and free. Untill the moment where i see that attachment is like love (defined and experienced on 3D level) a illusion. If a soul is standing in his own power why would he need to attache him(her)self to anything? Do we not hear from other realms and other souls or sources that they have no attachment and are free to be? I understand that all this is part of this world now, but are we not on the way out? Have we not learned that all this is a diff state than ouwer natural state? People who are possessive seem to talk the most about love, and use it in all kinds of strange ways. I never could grasp this way of thinking.
  • ~good QUESTion Amelia, & i get your grammar..~ lol.. i can dig it.

    sometimes, i take social surveys. for a few months, i will go to house parties, or whatever "social event" i find myself in, & ask random strangers this one: "Would you rather be an owner of a lonley heart? Or an owner of a broken heart?" I think "attachment" is a part.. as is the ripping away.. to endure is the real challenge.. to stay. :0)


    ~omg!~ those lyrics! genious.. ;0) i attach. i detach. i create. i destroy. i give ALL! i take it back! i sacrafice & i destroy..

    "be yourself. give your free will a chance. you've got to WORK to succeed!" ~YES

    "IN THE END YA GOTTA GO. LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAVE & DON'T YOU HESITATE AT ALL!" ~YES (rockin guitar solo) ;0) ~xo~
    • This song probably sums up what I was saying better than I did. Thank you! Yes often uses lyrics like this. They are a band of high awareness. My mom went to at least one of their shows, and she says the lead singer is one of the sweetest men in music.

      Of course, Peter Gabriel is my favorite. =)

      ----------------------

      Yes: Owner of a Lonely Heart

      Move yourself

      You always live your life

      Never thinking of the future

      Prove yourself

      You are the move you make

      Take your chances win or loser

      See yourself

      You are the steps you take

      You and you and that's the only way

      Shake, shake yourself

      You're every move you make

      So the story goes



      {Refrain} Owner of a lonely heart

      Owner of a lonely heart

      Much better than a

      Owner of a broken heart

      Owner of a lonely heart



      Say you don't want to chance it

      You've been hurt so before

      Watch it now The eagle in the sky

      How he dancin' one and only

      You, lose yourself

      No not for pity's sake

      There's no real reason to be lonely

      Be yourself Give your free will a chance

      You've got to want to succeed



      {Refrain}

      Owner of a lonely heart

      After my own decision

      They confused me so

      Owner of a lonely heart

      My love said never question your will at all

      In the end you've got to go Look before you leap

      Owner of a lonely heart

      And don't you hesitate at all, no no



      {Refrain twice}

      Owner of a lonely heart

      Sooner or later each conclusion

      Will decide the lonely heart

      Owner of a lonely heart

      It will excite it will delight

      It will give a better start

      Owner of a lonely heart

      Don't deceive your free will at all

      Don't deceive your free will at all

      Owner of a lonely heart

      Don't deceive your free will at all

      Just receive it

      More lyrics: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/y/yes/#share
      • Yes: The More We Live/ Let Go

        You and I can change the world;
        The more we live, the more we learn, the more we know.
        From this moment on we share the world;
        The more we give, the more we love, the more we grow.
        The spirit of imagination can lead us through the dark;
        The more we see, the more we try, the more we show.
        The evidence of our confusion, life has left it's mark;
        The more we fear, the more we lie, the more we hide.

        As we walk into tomorrow
        (Turning away from the path we know)
        Holding the future with our hands
        (We carry the weight of the world we go)
        It's up to you and I -- We hold the key; we hold the answers

        All our thoughts of doubt and fear are leaving one by one
        The more we live, the more we learn, the more we know.
        For each of us the road is clear and life has just begun;
        The more we give, the more we love, the more we grow.
        It's time to reach the goals we've set for ourselves;
        The more we fear, the more we lie, the more we hide.
        All we need is just to believe in ourselves;
        We face the truth, we see it clear, with no disguise.

        Cast away our doubt and sorrow
        (Turning away from the past we know)
        The Universe at our command
        (Conserving the fate of the world we grow)
        Together you and I, we hold the key to all the answers

        Let go
        Let go
        Let go
        Let go
        Let go

        More lyrics: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/y/yes/#share
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