Spiritual Blogs

The Self Observatory

Posted by Unlabeled? on January 21, 2011 at 12:46am
So, I was at school, and I thought it was time to start writing a journal, something where I could spill my guts into, and see if I could find a problem after writing for a while, and maybe a solution.This is it:"Well... there are a lot of things on my mind.There's homework, or school. Um... man, I've been faltering in...language, algebra, and perhaps social studies Hmm..Is it something bad? There are other questions that rack my mind...I keep thinking, "Is this bad? Is thinking about whether it's bad or nor, some quality of bad?" Usually I end it by telling myself, let it be. Just... let it be. But this doesn't totally work... because I think, this is wrong, I shouldn't just complacently say, well it's all right, love and light, because that might be someone else's words...and then I think, wht words are minre? How can I know that asking all those questions is actually me talking? And, will I ever get an answer?Will I ever get an answer?Well, maybe... I have to seek a goal. Instead of just asking random questions without an intent, maybe I should ask questions with a purpose. Because, asking questions should be done (how do I know that? I don't know. I suppose it's that I can ask questions that means asking questions has a purpose), but it should not the only thing I do. I must eventually do something... even if it's nothing.But, now the question (ack!) is, what should I do? What actions should I take?The answer is... it's up to you.So, I suppose it would help to define myself. That way, I can know what my goals are.So what am I?(Shift to third person)He seems to be quite introspective... but he's plagued by questions. He seeks, but he does not find. He, or his body, is ailing, not horribly, but it could be running better. He's at least slightly attached to his physical body; he seems to be aware of it. He's shy... and he sees this, too. He has a crush on a girl he's gone to school with. He's attached to her...and he sees this, too. But, he likes her. He likes the potential the attachment holds. He holds himself back because he perceives something that can be crossed, a border, a boundary. Even though he knows that, with her, there really aren't that many borders (edit: Or not?); he is like a friendly European, who holds back from entering Native land, and waits at a border he imagines for one of the natives to walk by... then, he tries to communicate in the short time he can talk to them (by staying in one spot) that he wants to go with them..sometimes, the European stands there, afraid that the Indian might not understand him, or misinterpret it him and do something. But, all the Indian was doing was wandering around looking for a kill, and had the European simply walked with the Indian, and make attempts to contact the Indian, and thus disregarding the border that he made up, then he would have been happier, he could have asked to enter the village, maybe stay there for a while, just maybe even stay there permanently. But, he worries that she already has a 'close friend', or that the parents might not even approve of even a simple relationship... he worries, and he sets up the imaginary borders that his society has taught him to see and fear. But they are imaginary! Lines are fictions of the mind... they can easily be transcended. But, she might have her own lines. He must find these out for himself. The other 'close friend' he fears she has... that's OK! He should find out for himself, in a respectful manner, of course, what her borders are. He can then follow them, and respect them. Maybe someday she will let him through her borders, maybe when she trusts him.But how will he begin?Talking to her when he sees her, just saying "hi", maybe asking if they can hang out? Patience will be a part of it, of course, but he shouldn't do things just because he thinks she might like him better. No, he has to talk her, communicate, try to learn her language.It will be hard in the beginning. But as time goes on, it will get better. Patience is key here.The only things that stops him from asking her... is him. Once he overcomes this fear, it should become easier to respect her boundaries by asking, instead of rushing it (edit: or hoping that the opportunity will hit him in the face!).Part of this fear, it seems to me, is that he is afraid of losing her. One shot, that's it. This is not so. The key is to remain respectful of her borders. Of course, he doesn't know what they are, but you will not receive if you do not ask.Remember that.Now, I am only fourteen years old, and so is she. Well, getting closer to 15. But it's probably too young to make a BIG move... just lay the foundation.
Views: 108
Tags: frustrating, questions
E-mail me when people leave their comments –
Follow

You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Comments

  • Unlabeled? January 25, 2011 at 2:47am
    Well, erm, today, it seems that a chapter has finished.
    I learned today that she is already dating someone... and I spent the entire day getting over that.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K%C3%BCbler-Ross_model
    But, then I got over it. I accepted that she, and not me, controls her.
    However, I do think that I will know her for the rest of her life, and probably not as a lover. Just a good friend.
    A thought occurred to me. I think that pleasure and pain, they are just carrot and stick, in the learning process of life. They provide context and meaning to the lessons learned.
    So... that's the end of one part of my life, at least for now.
  • mrtoon January 22, 2011 at 9:18am
    returns to your reminders of patience :)
    You are very intelligent ! I sense a great light; love to you brother!
  • Anush January 21, 2011 at 8:19pm

    Yes you are right!  What I meant was think less feel more! Balance, in all things there has to be balance.

    Dark and light, Love and hate, etc.  It is good to Analise and use your head, but be aware that it does not completely start to rule you.  Keep the balance.

     

    Ye have a great way of looking at life, just keep at it and don't loose heart.

     

    Laresh

    Anush (Marshal Law)

  • Unlabeled? January 21, 2011 at 6:09pm
    Yes! I agree.
    Fear, though, is something that I gotta work with.
    Disappointed, hurt, yes, that's part of it, part of learning.
    Fear is still instilled in me, gotta lose it.
    And, of course, I don't own her. I think part of me would have me believe other wise in some form or fashion, but in the end it's her choice, I can't control her!
    Hoo... get out of my head, into me heart. I think I'm already starting to do that.
    I wonder, though, what was the purpose of the head?
    To better use the heart?
  • Anush January 21, 2011 at 2:37pm

    LOL, Unlabled, get out of your head and into your heart!

     

    Stop analyzing life, start living it.  To draw lines, makes you go insane patrolling them.  Say HI to anyone out there and stop being afraid.  Open your heart, the only way to know what others would be is to open your heart.  Sometimes you are disappointed, sometimes hurt, but in the end you learn from all that.

     

    Fear is the only thing holding you caged.  The enemy is a friend that made a mistake. A unknown person is a friend waiting to be understood.

     

    The only thing holding you back is fear itself.

     

    You can not loose her or anything, as you do not own her or anything.  Our paths join and separate all the time, it is when you cling that you loose the most.

This reply was deleted.

Latest Blog Posts

Most Popular Blog Posts

Blog Topics by Tags

  • - (955)

Monthly Archives

Latest Activity

Spirit left a comment on Comment Wall
"I am going to get one of those flying cars but it will be yellow but a color we have never seen in this realm. I am excited and things are happening in my reality and i see lots of beauty coming in for all that have eyes to see!!!!!!!"
43 minutes ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"The Tesla flying car-spins in midair but there are no jets from the top of the vehicle"
2 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Yet another Sumerian tablet that mentions Earth's pre-flood FIRMAMENT.....It even describes the function of the water temples, being the figurative "pillars of heaven, holding the sky up.."
The Sumerian word for ceiling or roof, is…"
3 hours ago
Drekx Omega commented on Drekx Omega's video
"Yet another Sumerian tablet that mentions Earth's pre-flood FIRMAMENT.....It even describes the function of the water temples, being the figurative "pillars of heaven, holding the sky up.."
The Sumerian word for ceiling or roof, is…"
3 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Justin (saliently) asked:
"Drekx it says in your conversation with Kelly at the top of this blog something about certain advanced technologies that will help the people of those worlds to remember their former friends and family members who have…"
7 hours ago
Drekx Omega commented on Drekx Omega's blog post Kelly and Drekx discuss the destiny of non-ascendees
"Yes, Federation technologies will be freely available to all non-ascendees, on Solarian worlds, in which they evolve within ashrams within their local spiritual hierarchies...A 3rd density person, at say, the 2nd degree "baptism," may be learning to…"
8 hours ago
rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
Trump Says Oil, Gas, Mineral Exploration to Begin in Greenland; Agreement and Drilling Plans Draw Scrutiny; By Chase Codewell | Source.
Posted on 10/17/2026 by EraOfLight — Leave a reply President Donald Trump said on Oct. 14 that large-scale oil, gas and mineral exploration is about to begin in Greenland, an autonomous Danish territory. He did not provide details about the…
See More
8 hours ago
rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
Sananda: Be Calm Within the Storm; Channel: James McConnell | Source 1 2.
Posted on 10/17/2026 by EraOfLight — Leave a reply I am Sananda,I come to be with you at this time, in these moments, in these changing moments. These moments that you are finding yourself in more and more and more, as things are shifting all…
See More
8 hours ago
More…

New Forum Posts