Many millions have experienced a similar dark night of the soul. When I was 16 I tried to kill myself, I did not want to go on living, for every moment was agonising emotional pain. Over 1 million people kill themselves each year. That's around 2700 every day. The bright positivity or strong will to survive and persist that so many others take for granted is alien to them. They can be surrounded by much love and yet even this is not always enough. Something is totally broken within the soul. To empathise with such a soul, is to realise that although we may think the events leading up to this state were trivial by our standards. Yet the agony that the person feels is vast and unbearable.
Stating the law of karma in these situations is not helpful in anyway. The laws of the universe are meaningless to such. The brilliance of the highest divine light has no meaning. Even the love that surrounds all, for them may as well be in another galaxy, far, far away. To look within this abyss is to see that although existence has stellar heights of supreme wonder, bliss and beauty. That there are also depths of absolute despair and horror, grave beyond all measure and reason. This is the wonder and the terror of being alive. To comprehend the scope of the profundity of what it means to exist.
The worst of all is to feel nothing at all. To be totally numb to everything. To pass beyond what it means to feel like a human being. To exist within only a dull sensation of curious detachment. "Sounds like bliss", says the soldier in the movie the thin red line, who has just been told by a veteran how he feels nothing anymore.
For such a person who experiences the terrible agony of the dark night of the soul or the person who experiences only utter numbness of life. Their immortal spirit is having an original encounter with Eternity. Their soul is ripped out of time and space and they are confronted with the vast abyss of emptiness out of which the universe was created. Such an abyss destroys all attachment and ego, all desire, craving and material concern and leaves nothing behind except the pure divine spark that was given to the soul.
This encounter is telling the immortal spirit of the individual, that their divine destiny is one of total cosmic freedom, free of any attachment to an identity, personality or ego. That they are divine, transcendent and immortal.
The Creator creates out of nothing. Out of the abyss the creator fashions the universes of spirit and matter, creates love, harmony and beauty out of emptiness. When we find our self in such a place, where there is no Love, where we are alone and separated from all. Where all attachment is gone and no one, neither gods nor men, answer our pleas for help. It is then the very defining moment of our existence and the expression of the reason for which we were created. We take upon ourselves the mantle of the creators we are meant to become. From out of the divine light that is in us and the power of our heart. We create love where there is none, we become an ocean of compassion, where there is only a desert of agony. We fill the world with the selfless blessings of a being free of ego and selfishness. Or in the words of a spirit of the sphere of mars "I am the spark of life leaping across the arc, I chart the path through darkness, so beauty and love may exist. Each moment contains an abyss, the heart forges the pathway across. My secret name is bliss, I chart the path between the stars."
Often times a person suffering from severe depression, can be surrounded by much love and care which I am sure helps. Yet no one can give that person the will to recover. Sure they may need healing and attention from both humans and angels. But in the end it is up to them whether or not they will recover. In this regard they alone have to find the inspiration and magic to heal and create a new purpose and spirit within. Often times this does happen. Sadly others go on to commit suicide. Whatever the case, it is an exercise of our own power. The power to destroy our life or the power to recreate it anew. This power we have been given by the divine, and with it there is nothing that we cannot attain. We can either snuff out our flame. Or we can choose to shine our light the brightest we can possibly be.
"You don't have to feel like a waste of space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane, comes a rainbow
Maybe the reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow
And when it's time you know
You just gotta ignite the light, and let it shine"
Katy Perry - Firework