It all started end of November last year, when we did a hypno-meditation on a 2-day hypnotherapy course. For – at that time – no rhyme or reason, I burst into tears when the facilitator described how the sandman was walking through a desert on his own during the night trying to get to a special place where he could get more sand. She described the desert as being covered by a blanket of silvery moonlight, and a very beautiful Milky Way. Though sobbing all way until the end of the hypno-meditation (oh yeah, I had my own tissue box), I refused to get out of the hypnotic state as I really enjoyed the serenity and tranquillity, and as I felt deeply connected to the loneliness, but also the beauty of what I visualized.
After the meditation, I was absolutely “busted.” No chance to actively participate, I just listened to the lecture we received that Sunday, hoping my subconscious mind would pick up all the necessary information. I knew I didn’t suffer from hypno hangover; there was something else attached.
For the next two and a half months I experienced the most horrific emotional roller coaster trips I could imagine, and the worst was, they started to exponentially reoccur. And with each of them, I would sink further down into a deeper kind of depression. I couldn’t explain that at all, but after having read all the posts dealing with emotions on spiritual websites, I just ticked it off as “energy shifts everybody goes through” and decided to go with the flow.
Last Saturday, on the most recent hypnotherapy course, they needed a guinea pig for the stuff we had learned, and I volunteered.
I was in deep hypnosis and the facilitator asked what emotion is very relevant to me right now and I answered “Loneliness.” I was regressed further back to where I experienced similar emotions, and, to cut a long story short, I saw myself in the womb when my mother said, “I’m not ready to have this child. She’s an accident.”
[My mom and I had a discussion about this already in August (note – this was before the meditation), and it actually got us much closer, as we both were speaking our truth.]
As in hypnotherapy you always need to find the original event/emotion/feeling that causes your current problem (ISE = initial sensitizing event), the facilitator asked me once more to go back in time and I found myself “in space.” That’s all. (If you regress as far as into the womb, in the regression that follows thereafter you usually step right back into a past life which is most relevant to your current situation, so this floating in space was somewhat uncommon.) It was very dark and I floated around like a “ghost” and couldn’t see anything. As the facilitator and I weren’t getting anywhere (nothing made sense), she regressed me even further and I found myself sitting with some of my guides (no clear picture though), charting this lifetime.
So, the sandman walking through the desert (under hypnosis I answered “I feel deserted”) was a trigger for me that there was still some stuff that needed to be attended to. And then it clicked. I thought I had forgiven my mother completely, but this wasn’t true. I still held some grudges that kept me from being “free.”
The facilitator then applied the steps used in hypnotherapy to solve the issue, and I must say, I feel a lot better. However, also in hypnotherapy the rule “it takes 21 days to change a habit” applies. So I will have to wait and see, if I can even feel more relief than I already do.
Maybe one of the purposes of the energy shifts is to make us more sensitive to the issues we still need to resolve?
I don’t know.
So what do you think?
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