At least once a week I'll have a nightmare regarding my ex. I consider them nightmares, because I don't want to see her ever again after what she did to me.
Yesterday a friend invited me to a fire-spinning show to see her perform... Then I found out the people responsible for single-handedly ruining the relationship we had, is performing.
I lost it. Anger, frustration... started crying. Then the nightmares this morning.
I can't party with the friends I used to have, because there was a schism.
I know 'everything happens for a reason', but that doesn't mean none of it will stop bothering me.
There is a wedding dress sitting under boxes in the garage... the dress she was supposed to wear when we were supposed to get married. I don't know why to my ex, experimental sex was better than having a long-lasting relationship... I guess that's what drugs does to you I suppose.
End rant....
Comments
Sounds like you do need to sever the ties and move on to make new friends. These things can haunt a person for a long time, particularly if it's unresolved.
Get rid of anything in the house that belongs to her.
Also remember we are spirits having a human experience. If she wanted 'experimental sex' (and how many men go for that on their bucks night before they are commiting to just one person?) - then that was her free will choice. There's nothing that no one can do, as that was a choice she made. We don't own a person or have exclusive ownership rights over anyone. We must let them be.
Letting Go
February 7, 2012
There are things in life that cannot be monetized, like happiness, freedom and inner peace. Yet, many souls do not know how to get to a place where they can live a life with these qualities. That goal can be accomplished through the practice of Letting Go. Letting Go is the process of identifying and releasing old patterns from your life.
Some of the energy of the past is hidden so deeply, that it may take a series of events to bring it to the surface. So, why is letting go so important? Letting go is not about forgiveness, it is about understanding. Letting go is a process by which you do not forget about things that have come to pass, but instead you acknowledge them and build up a renewed viewpoint of them.
By dismissing past events or by not discussing them, you continue to let them have power over you. By acknowledging them and allowing all of the emotions and energy to be released, then you are finally able to come to that place of peace within yourself.
Everything in your life is there to teach you something about yourself. Even in the darkest, most difficult circumstances, you are taught about your own strength and reliance to overcome obstacles.
You can also learn about yourself from the smallest events in life. For example, what does waiting in line teach you about yourself? Maybe it teaches you to be at one with your surroundings, or to have patience, or even to appreciate the divine timing of that experience. If you find yourself getting angry or frustrated about something in your life, this is an indicator that you have yet to fully let it go.
When you do not let something go, it can become the center of how you define yourself. Many souls have been mistreated by someone in this life; this is not an uncommon experience. If you have experienced such a mistreatment, then to say that everything is good and perfect in your life would be inaccurate. Yet, this is how some choose to cope with pain. But, to let go you need to move past that denial and say, “yes this person did this or that to me,” that is the first step of acknowledgement.
Next is getting into the emotions that you felt and still feel about those events or circumstances. Let yourself understand and express those emotions. There are many safe and healthy ways to do this including, journaling, exercise, art therapy, meditation, yoga and talking to a friend, personal coach or counselor. Find the right combination of healthy expression for you to allow the emotions and energy to be released safely.
When you do not take time for this last step, you actually end up burying the energy deeper inside of you and that is when it can become physical pain or disease, if not dealt with. Once the energy is fully released, then you can truly say you have let it go.
It has been asked if there is a quick way to release this energy, just by wishing it to be gone. However, this is not how the emotional body works. Imagine if all of the sad emotions in your entire life were written down with a pencil on paper. One day someone comes by and says “you don’t have to experience that anymore, because I have this magic eraser.” So you erase and erase the words, but you still don’t feel any better. This is because the magic eraser cannot eliminate the imprint that those words left behind.
To get rid of those emotions it is about being able to let go of your attachment to those words; to bring up all of the emotions attached to those words until the imprint fades totally away. Does that mean that the words go away? No, they will always be there. Instead, through the process of letting go you are now able to look at those words differently. And, one day you will be able to pick up that paper and it will feel like freedom, instead of despair.
Everyone has moments that define them in their life, some good some bad. But, do not let those moments have power over you any longer. Whether good or bad they are not a representation of the totality that is you and if you are defining yourself by just a few experiences in your life, then your vision of yourself is actually quite limited.
You are truly unlimited and the more that you release the wounds of the past and allow them to heal, the freer you become to be attuned to the Now moment: the moment when creation and manifestation begin, the moment when you can always choose what to do and how to feel about it. Do not let your Self pull you back to what someone else said about you, instead use affirmations to find a new mantra.
You can be renewed in every moment, so why not let go of those things that hold the emotions of the past. It is time for you to release those anchors of fear, doubt and anxiety and instead shift your perspective to a peaceful understanding of how strong you really are and how much you are capable of. You are truly amazing.
Love, Aurora
http://aurorasmessage.com/channel_020612.html