I am a feminist. I am proud to be a feminist. Contrary to popular belief, feminism is NOT a dirty word.

I am a feminist because I believe women are powerful and we have been wrongly denied our rightful place as EQUALLY important aspects in Earth's divine makeup. I am a feminist because women are divine spirits, we are powerful in our femininity, we are unique in our ability to give birth, to bleed and not die, to network and create beauty and life.

I am a feminist because I believe patriarchy has held the reigns for too long.

I am NOT a feminist because I believe women are superior, nor because I hate men. Feminism did not make me hate men.

MEN made me hate men.

Men who lie and steal and cheat. Men who rape, who torture who abduct. Men who proudly proclaim that 'rape' is just a joke in society now, something to be laughed at and spat on. Men who think women's primary function is THEIR pleasure. Men who fight and kill and laugh at the spoils of war.

THEY are the reason I hate men. And no, not all men, but sadly the ones I don't hate are becoming fewer and fewer. I'm almost too scared to talk to some now because I know they will just dribble my disappointment right out of their mouths.

Over the past 3 or 4 days I've been witness to a condensed version of societies views on rape. I am ashamed and horrified to say there are far too many people out there who do not understand what it is about. Who do not see the bigger picture, the culture that promotes, condones and covers up rape and abuse.

It is awful to watch. It is heartbreaking to see people pushing free speech as a reason to keep slogans like "It's not rape. It's surprise sex" alive and thriving.

I.... don't know how to fix it. I don't know if I have the strength to change it. It is so disheartening. It makes me want to go far away, away from people. Away from modern society that "prides" itself on being so technologically connected, so civilised, so educated. It's not. It's pathetic. It's deranged and archaic in thought and expectations. It's dog eat dog and forget about everyone else. It's isolating. It's cold.

I am saddened by all this. I don't even know what to do with this disappointment. I pray that Lilith, my patron Goddess can give me the strength of spirit to know that everything is as it should be. That everything really IS right with the world, even in amongst all that horrible, terrible wrong. It is on schedule, we are moving forward.

I hope I'm not wrong.

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